There just ain’t nuttin quite like milking a good ole tough-nut resentment is there?  Why, I’ve been known to stay mad, aggravated or irritated at someone for days nay weeks at a time?!  Inside of the pit of our bellies, resentments feel like an ever burning ember.  If it made a sound, it’d be a low moaning grrrrrrrrrrrr.  I’ve heard it said that, “having a resentment is like taking poison and hoping it makes someone else sick”.

This past week, I had the opportunity to milk a resentment because of something that took less than five seconds in the making.  Usually when you get mad that quickly because of something someone says or does and it festers for awhile, it’s because more than likely there are resentment appendages from the past that haven’t fully been excised.   Oh I wanted to milk that particular resentment for hours after my first pangs of it.  I knew that steeping in that kind of negativity is just about the worst thing you can do for your health and well-being, but I kept blowing on that burning ember well into the wee hours of the morning.  Finally, I became willing to listen to my better judgment and pulled out a recommended prayer for situations such as this which is basically, “bless them, change me”.  And every time I felt that ember burn, I would say that prayer.  It was hard to give up that satisfying burn at first, but with time the softness of peace feels better than the burn of anger.

Sometimes that short prayer is just about all I can manage because if I try to make my prayers any fancier of words and thoughts leastwise longer, than I get some resentment-embers stuck in the crevices of my heart and before you know it any good intentions have been blown wide open and I’m back into the roaring fire of resentfulness.  The reason harboring resentments is not healthy for me is because when I totally allow them to take over then the stakes for keeping them burning grow higher and higher and so to keep them going I might have to have words with the beholder of my flames to re-ignite my anger.  I also believe that actions towards fanning the flames of resentment retard my growth to a higher consciousness immediately.  It’s all probably another example of how instant gratification can hurt you.

So next time you may find yourself in a situation to milk a resentment for all it’s worth remember two things that you can do:

1.) find a place inside or outside where you can growl really loudly for a while.  Give it all you got. Put all that anger and resentment right into your growl and growl it on out.

2.) pray for whomever or whatever you are angry/resentful about to be blessed and ask for you to be changed (your perceptions, your beliefs, your understandings)…by the way, this works whether you believe in God/Divinity or not. Say as needed anytime you think about who or what you’re angry with until the embers cool.

Caution: be prepared during applications of the above for the gremlins of self-doubt and disturbance to throw unexpected opportunities for re-flaming your way.  You may just need an especially potent dosing of surrender and acceptance for diffusing.

What resentments have you been milking lately?