DINK #279 Looking At Goals From Both Sides Now

Posted on : 28-12-2010 | By : Lynn | In : Uncategorized


When you hear or read the word “goal” what do you think?   Is there anyone else out there who is like me and would do pretty much anything to not say the word “goal”?  And that was tough for me considering that when coaching people about their lives or careers, there was many a time that the word “goal” was utilized.  I even learned a great goal-setting technique through the Success Unlimited Network (SUN) which was to set “achievable” goals.  Made sense for my clients or friends but not so much for myself.

The problem with having learned how to disassociate myself from uncomfortable or disturbing people and/or situations was that reflexively I could sometimes disassociate from something that was good for me—such as setting goals—because of a preconceived misunderstanding I had of what it meant for me.

Some of you may recognize the camp that I belonged which was the “oh, but that is good for everyone else but I’m different” camp.  Quite useful when carrying around preconceived misunderstandings and acting on them without question.

My preconceived misunderstanding about goals for me was that somehow “Lynn goals” were already set (I guess I thought they had been set genetically before I popped out of the womb) and in most cases, these preset goals would mostly be unachievable because of the level of perfection that would have to be achieved.

Ahhhah!! There’s that word and concept again..sneaking into my idea of goals!!  PERFECTIONISM.

Case in point.  When my SUN Coach asked me to set some “achievable” goals over the next two weeks (about ten of them)…I set what I thought was achievable such as taking three 1.5 hour yoga classes per week, running 20 miles/week, and 8 other goals.  Well, of course you know what happened.  I made one yoga class in 8 days (whereas before I had to set my goals I made 2 yoga classes every 7 days) and many of the goals I hadn’t even touched. Why you might ask? Because I had set the mark so high for achieving my goals that I gave up before I had even gotten started.  God forbid if it was proven that I was less than 100% perfect?!

So being the sometimes slow learner that I am, today I am seeing the partnership between writing down your goals and attracting what you want in your life.  I’ve done a whole lot of breath work on both of those subjects (goals and attraction) but not a whole lot of activating either on my end.  Today I’m starting off slowly.  Instead of setting unrealistic goals of what I think I “should” be setting…such as going to the gym 3 days a week…I’m setting achievable goals such as going to the gym twice a week. Shoot, then anything after that will either be gravy or crazy or maybe even a combo of the two! (wasn’t there a musician with that name awhile back??)

Just pondering the wisdom of setting goals as we head out of 2010 and into 2011 and what with Jupiter sticking out his chest and all kinds of astrological signs pointing us in the direction of great change right about now and into the New Year, it just seems to make good sense to find ways to set achievable goals.

Still can’t quite admit to myself that I just might be “average”—not that there is anything the matter with that — but getting closer to accepting my humanity while I learn how to roll along in this life.

What about you? How are you looking at something from another direction?

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