I’ve been working on a project for the past few days transcribing interviews from women in all age groups and I’m amazed to hear that there are still so many of us out there (that includes you men as well) who don’t seem to know what it means to take care of ourselves. Some people have it down when it comes to caring for ourselves physically, they get regular massages and they get their nails done (yes, you men do to you know who you are…) but I’m talking about the mental, emotional and spiritual aspects of caring for yourselves.

Here’s a top ten list to help you get started on your own list of what I consider to be important considerations to caring for oneself:

1. Be a tolerant free zone.

I think the grandfather of Coaching, Thomas Leonard coined that phrase. What I take it to mean is to be vigilant about weeding out those things, habits, and people in your life that you are tolerating needlessly. Address it or them and be done with it one way or another

2. Care for yourself as if you were the most important person in the world because you are.

You know the old lesson that the flight attendants tell us every time we board a plane and fasten our seat belt, right? If there should be a sudden drop in cabin pressure the air masks will drop…..and to put it on yourself first and then on the person seated next to you. It’s simple. We can’t be of any use to anyone else if we’re not in good shape first.

3. Find a reason to laugh and do it a lot

I don’t care who you are (except for maybe Sheldon on The Big Bang Theory and even he has his “Bazinga” moments) you can find something to laugh about. You know they have laughing clubs in India where all people do is go to laugh. And it’s good to laugh with other people. Laughter is infectious. Trying it, it’s good for what ails you.

4. Be willing to be willing to connect with something greater than yourself.

In the 12-step rooms that I’ve frequented over the years, they encourage you to surrender your addiction to a person, place, or thing to something greater than yourself. Use your imagination if you don’t believe in a higher power or a God. God, by the way, can be considered as an acronym for Good Orderly Direction.

5. Take time out to notice the magic that is all around you

Because it is and if you haven’t seen it yet, keep on looking. There’s always a sunset to see and a star to ponder. How did that flower grow up from between the cracks in the cement anyway? Look for the magic and don’t give up until you find it or it finds you.

6. Your body is a temple, treat it that way.

If you’re smoking, quit. If you’re thinking about it, don’t start. If you live to eat flip it around to remember that we eat to live. If you are letting your reptilian brain run your hormones and are acting out sexually, consider the sacred and wonder enlighten yourself to a higher specialness. Love yourself. Love yourself. Love yourself. Only then will you be able to truly love others with no strings attached.

7. Get plenty of sleep

I don’t care who you are, you need to get a good restful night’s sleep so that when your feet hit the floor you are ready to grab on to the day. If you’re lucky enough to work from home or have a private office and can grab a cat nap in the afteroon—DO IT!! My Dad has always sworn to the refreshing 20 minute nap. I prefer 30 minutes, but whatever suits you best. Get enough sleep, it really will make a different.

8. Give yourself 30 minutes of quiet time/meditation time everyday no matter what.

If you know of a meditation practice that you enjoy then make a commitment to do that everyday. If you don’t, then keep it simple. Light a candle or incense and as my yoga teacher says, “follow your breath”. Just let your thoughts come in and out. Set a clock so you don’t have to worry about the next thirty minutes. Ideally, if you can go outside, do that, but if not, see if you can go somewhere that is quiet and peaceful. Your mind, body and soul will love you for this gift that you are giving yourself.

9. Find a creative outlet to express yourself

I don’t care who you are, you have creativity in you that is just yours that no body else has. Do you write? Do you paint? Do you garden? Are you active in Second Life or gaming? Find a creative way to express who you are and do it often.

10. Allow yourself to love and be loved.

Seems simple doesn’t it? But it is probably one of the most difficult things that we will ever do as a human. It seems sad that this is true because really when you get down to it, this is what we are all really all about to love and be loved. But somewhere in the mix we get distracted by the illusion of life. Make a decision today, right now to allow a little bit of love in each day and to give a little bit of love out each day. By the end of the week, you may be pleasantly surprised at the results.

Remember, take care of yourself because when you do everyone around you benefits and most especially you do.