During this time of the year when the stores have barely put up the Halloween decorations before they’re putting up the Christmas decorations – much less the Thanksgiving decorations – I can find myself swept up in a myriad of feelings. 

I can relate to many of the symptoms of Asperger’s Syndrome because my senses seem to be heightened at this time of year so that I feel like I’m on sensory overload which includes sites, sounds, smells and tastes.  For many of us who also may have unresolved childhood or addiction issues, we are like a giant raw nerve walking around waiting for any reason to vibrate!  It has been said by a great man many years ago, that “acceptance was the key to all my problems”.  What I understand that to mean for myself today is that I accept who I am and where I am in my life right now—with as little judgment as possible—so that I can then come up with a plan to care for myself during times when I am the most sensitive and raw.

Last week I became a maniac before I realized it!! When I get stressed , what I tend to do is to pile more things on top of my “to-do-list” until it is beyond being realistic for any one person to accomplish in a finite period of time.  When I can come up for air, I know right then is a good time to make a phone call to someone who I can talk about what is going on so that I can gain perspective on my day.  It’s about me taking responsibility for my part in how I am perceiving the world around me. Sometimes it’s just the process of saying out loud the unrealistic to-do-list that I have set out for myself, which helps me to “see” my craziness.

My mom has always been one of my favorite non-traditional traditionalists.  Many a Thanksgiving we have piled in the car and taken off for parts unknown in the country to grill a steak and bake a potato while enjoying a late autumn sunset.  A few years ago, she started a new way of celebrating this time of the year which involved NOT buying into all of the “shoulds” of the season.  If she had a dear friend or family member that she wanted to buy a special card for, she would. She stopped buying into the mass marketing of the holidays.  I have to admit, it has taken me many years for me to finally have grown into a strong respectful opinion of the stance my mother so bravely has taken.  Now I find myself having the courage to look at my own life and taking some stances of my own in terms of how I want to celebrate during this time of year. It may not look like anyone else’s but it is mine.

Tomorrow for Thanksgiving we are going to have family and friends over for dinner in the evening.  Today, I am going to begin caring for myself by taking some extra quiet time (45 minutes instead of 30) and letting go of some of my shoulds  (our acre and a half has to look perfect before 6pm!) . I’m also going to focus on something that I can be grateful about (how soothing it feels to take some deep breaths while relaxing my shoulders back out of their crunched up state). 

I’m grateful for each of you who are reading this because you have taken time for yourself to consider what you want in your life.  I believe that for every one of us who are willing to do whatever it takes to understand ourselves better, we are doing our part to make the world a better place.