DINK #166 We Will Not Regret The Past Nor Wish To Shut The Door On It!

Posted on : 02-09-2010 | By : Lynn | In : Uncategorized

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One of the promises in the 9th step of Alcoholic Anonymous is that “we will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it”. Psychologically speaking, you can see the wisdom that enables this promise to offer someone hope who may have been reeking havoc in the world as a result of their drinking. Many people who just don’t know much about what it takes to stop drinking don’t often consider that stopping drinking is just the beginning of the process of learning how to live. When you get far enough down the road of sobriety that you can start adding up hours into days and days into weeks, then many of us have looked up, scratched our heads and asked, “what the hell is this all about, this thing called life?” And when you get sober enough to look at where you are and where you’ve come from the road can look pretty dismal because you don’t have your sobriety lenses on yet.

I’ve got a very colorful past in my drinking career that I can dust off and shake out to share some experience, strength and hope of my journey so that others can see what may be possible for them. If I was full of fear or regret of my past and wished I could shut the door on it then I really couldn’t be of much service to others who may be coming up the road behind or beside me. This promise has let me know that if I do the work required to clean up my side of the street and focus on how I do my best in living then I will learn how to accept my past and use it as a tool to be of service to others.

Don’t get me wrong, there are still times that I look at all the years I wasted when I was totally drinking and smoking and not paying attention to anything but what was the next thing that I could do, get, say or be that would help me feel better. It’s that illusive thing again that always crops its head up in my life that says, “right over here…just right over here…is much better than where you are now….”

Over the years I’ve been blessed to experience the connectedness and love that comes from being honest about who I am now and who I’ve been in my past. Turns out, there’s a whole lot of people out there who can relate to my history if not by the specifics, then with how I have felt. One of the sayings that you’ll hear a lot in recovery rooms is “we’re only as sick as our secrets.”

If you are new to sobriety or even right on the precipice of deciding that drinking has hurt you more than helped you, then what I would want you to take from this blog tonight is that you are not alone. There are so many people that have been on this path before you and are on it right now who are there for you. In fact, giving someone who is sober the opportunity to share their history with you actually helps to keep that person sober believe it or not. Ask as many questions as you want, listen to as many stories as you can, read all the literature you can get your hands on and know that you are embarking on a very special journey that you will never regret.

We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it because when you can look at your life through the eyes of something or someone bigger than yourself (I call this my Higher Power) then you will know that every blade of your life, every breath you have taken has a purpose and meaning. You really are an extraordinary and beautiful gift from the divine.

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